You’re Amongst Friends
Once upon a time, I was told by someone that should have known better that “therapists are for people who have no friends”. I was 16, bulimic, and headed to my first ever therapy session. Not the most auspicious start.
The thing is that I didn’t really have many friends at the time (or didn’t believe I did) and what she said hurt. By this stage I had moved countries more than once and I didn’t really feel rooted – or frankly welcome – where I was. I wanted to feel “normal” as any kid does but I had grown up outside of the norms of community. I had never lived anywhere for more than 3-4 years. Things I knew, others didn’t. Things they knew, I didn’t. I was always the kid with a weird accent and the wrong hair/clothes/attitude. I felt stupid. Inferior. It sent me inwards and for someone who is already on a downward spiral, that’s not a good place to be.
It’s OK to talk
For my money, it’s not just OK, it’s absolutely bloody vital.
Since moving to the UK nearly 14 years ago, a lot has changed for me and a lot hasn’t. I still have weird hair and dress a bit…odd. Although these days I don’t mind looking that way. Normal is boring, right? I’m still struggling with my illness. I still have days where I’m still that 16 year old kid who wasn’t perfect enough to love. Today is one of those days. Ironic, considering, but I guess that’s why I felt I had to write this (no, I am not suicidal).
One of the most important things I’ve learnt through 22 years and 6 bouts of depression is this: Reach out and ask for help. You’ll probably be surprised at what comes back. You’ll definitely be surprised by the people who rally around you. The love and support that you so desperately need usually IS there…but you may need to let someone know that you need them.
If you can’t get help in your immediate surroundings, MIND have a list of places in the UK where you can go to get help right now.
You can talk to me, too…because I hope that with this Clipper community we’re building, we are all amongst friends here.
Posted on September 10, 2016 by Shona Davies
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